I am moving my blog from Tumblr to WordPress. I’ve also changed the name now:
The Aquarium Speaks
You can access my older posts on my old Tumblr site:
I hope this new blog will help empower you to feel confident and ready to begin the road towards recovery. Or at least provide food for thought. And even if you don’t feel like you’re on that road, don’t worry! Reaching out and reading things online is a great first step towards recovery.
Remember: recovery is a process. Recovery takes time. Recovery is not a goal. It’s not like, “Hey, I’m recovered! Wow! I feel great!” No way. Recovery is a road that you travel. You choose to put your foot on the gas pedal, even if you can only tap it the tiniest bit. That’s progress!! And sometimes, you gotta go in reverse too. One of my mantras has been, “2 steps forward, 1 step back.” I say it to myself when I “mess up” or when I feel down. That little statement helps me realize that my mess-ups are not failures. They’re just steps back. We have to sometimes step back to see where we are, and then change our forward direction a little. Think of a car getting out of a parking spot. If you don’t go in reverse, sometimes you can’t get out!
Anyway, I hope to help you all in your recovery journies. A note also: I will be sharing my stories regarding my experiences with schizoaffective disorder. I have experience with symptoms of schizophrenia, depression and bipolar disorder. I have to admit, that for me, the most frightening experiences have been my “schizophrenic” ones. They are frightening, and also very isolating. Because I have been lost in that alternate reality at times, I felt very alone. I felt alone because no one saw this reality except for me. And if I explained it to anyone, no one would get me, and I would just be branded as “schizophrenic.”
For those of us with schizophrenia… people who know us may want to help, but they don’t know how to reach us. We might say things that don’t make sense to them. Or our behavior is “off.” We are so often the victims of judgment. People judge us on our behavior or our “incoherent” speech. But truly, we are human souls, just like everyone else! Everyone has a voice. And I hope that, in sharing my story and reflections of recovery, I can help you find your voice too.
Scratch that… you already have a voice. But maybe, you need more confidence to use it. Or maybe you need to sort through the voices and excess information (aka “delusions”) to find it. That’s where I want to help you. I’ve had success, and I want you to have success too.
Best of wishes! And thank goodness spring is upon us!